Anxiety

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I woke up this morning with this overwhelming feeling to create. I wanted to create badly. As I looked in the mirror, disappointment. My hair didn’t look good, I would have to wash it and flatten it… That would take a couple of hours. “Maybe today is not the day. Tomorrow.” I shot myself down then and there. As I went out to walk my dog an overwhelming sense of anxiety began kicking in.
As per the usual, I was listening to a podcast on my morning walking route with Betsy but I was hearing none of it. The anxiety grew bigger and my thoughts grew darker. The feeling of despair began taking over. I’m tired of listening to successful people. I am tired of struggling, I am tired of excuses and I am most certainly tired of sabotaging myself.
I returned home and fed my dog. I sat on the couch next to her in a huge bout of anxiety, anger and resentment. “Why not me? Why am I still stuck in the mud? When will it be my turn to succeed?”. Then, inspiration struck. This is why I love following my intuition and gut and fully trusting in the Universe.
“Create a piece about anxiety. You have this emotion that you are feeling, Anna so what are you going to do with it?”
With this new insight in mind, I began to explore my feelings further. What does anxiety look like? What does it feel like to me? If I was creating a portrait, what features would I include? My hair in a bun is perfect. I am perfect as I am right now in this moment. I choose to create with what I have and I challenge myself to do so. Anxiety feels like something is restraining me. Anxiety feels like my basic senses have been taken away. I cannot speak, I cannot see, I cannot hear, I cannot move. Anxiety. It’s dark, it’s ugly. it’s restraining.
WHAT DOES ANXIETY FEEL LIKE TO YOU?
IF YOU COULD PICK ONE EMOTION TO CREATE FROM, WHICH WOULD IT BE?

Posted by adbrucephotos on 2018-09-11 21:05:36

Tagged: , Macabre , Creepy , Dark , Dark Art , Black , Black and White , Black Shirt , Black and White Photography , Halloween , Haunted , Soul , Anxiety , Anguish , Woman , Fine Art , Emotion , Portrait , Self Portrait Photography , Self Portraiture , Self Portrait , Nikon , Black wall , Tied Down , Constrained , Restricted